New Blogsite

Guys, you can visit me in my new blogsite.
http://ching23.wordpress.com/

Rank No.1

As of the moment, the Puerto Princesa Subterranean River Park is leading in the search for the new 7 wonders of the world. Whoa! knowing this makes me truly proud of the Philippine's rich resources. Visit this site http://www.new7wonders.com/nature/en/liveranking/

for a complete list of the nominees.

*Thankful*

This, so far is the post that I got a lot of views on.
Thanks mucho.. I'm not a date expert and these are just
very simple tips and I'm glad readers has taken a look on it.
You can access this by clicking on this link:

http://www.beyondjane.com/Relationships/Dating/Tips-for-a-Successful-First-Date.166581


Thanks again!

Alive! again...

I had finally found the urge to write again in my blog after how many weeks of missing it.
There have been a lot of things that I'm missing to share in this space but anyway.. I'm back
not with a vengeance ( that's for sure) but for as long as I feel the need to pour out whats on my mind right now.I went home to Ormoc ( the place where I'm from) to visit my family. Whoa! my nephew seems to get bigger and bigger every time. Everything seems to be okay and my sister's stomach's growing bigger ( she's 3 months pregnant).I wonder how it feels to have a growing creature inside of you. Something in thier physical state makes me feeluneasy. How can you carry such weight for 9 months? But I know the emotional feeling and contentment can never replace the physical torment. My sister looks like she's having a hard time in her first trimerster. Well, I think she's beginning to outgrew it. I mean, this hasnt been her first time to get preggy ayt? Wish and pray for a smooth sailing pregnancy period for my dear sis.. Can't wait for the additional member coming up soon.

Dropping Him Like A Hot Potato

My Ex has a tendency to become very dependent on me. Not the type of attitude I like especially for a guy like him. Must be the reason why in the very first place we did not make it as a couple. We turned out to be being civil again and it seems like his attitude is there AGAIN… so I must get rid of it or HIM before I put myself in the kind of situation I have been through before. I know its not good to talk about a person you’ve had been with, but I cant help it but sometimes its better to just avoid him for now.

Gaga Over Gossip

Just finished watching the first season of Gossip Girl. I must admit it attracted me in a way that it’s all a web of relationships… complexities, simplicities and the gossip that keeps on pouring in and out. What I like most? The mysterious Gossip Girl – Who is She?

What Blogging Means To Me

I did set up my blog site because I love to be able to personally lay down the cards once and for all when I feel like doing it. Sometimes, the thought of posting anything that matters to me is such a relief since I’m known to be the silent type of person. I just love doing it. Period. Then, I have come to realize that there are a lot of possibilities that you can earn from what you’re doing. Something like going commercial. I did sign up for some blogging portals where you can earn at the same time and do what you love to do. This is a very beneficial gateway. I was already accepted ( some have been rejected) but I don’t know what’s gotten on to me that I cant just submit my links to start off a new line of blogging path. Maybe I’m not just ready to give up that personal touch that is unique in a blog. I wanted the contents to remain personal. All of it. And so I was thinking that If I’ll go for the business thing, I’d rather set up another blog site. Am I doing the right thing? Hopefully I am. But we are entitled to change our decisions right? So which is which now for me? Duh… another confusing moment!

I'm Into Poetry

I have signed up for an online writing portal because I wanted to be able to share my ideas and submit literary pieces that evolved in my imagination (LOL). I’m sure I’m not a good poet but I was so happy upon receiving news that my articles are to be published. Anyways, I’m posting the links where you can read my poems.

1. http://www.authspot.com/Poetry/My-Eyes-Seek-for-You.172965
2. http://www.authspot.com/Poetry/Letting-You-Go.172909
3. http://www.authspot.com/Poetry/No-One-But-Myself.168361
4. http://www.authspot.com/Poetry/Unforgiven-Love.167069
5.http://www.authspot.com/Poetry/Loves-Definitions.172915

Alrose's Way on TOP

She’s fashionable, a chic, funny, humorous . She’s my friend and she made it! Congrats Alrose for being our new in team trainer! You deserve it and way to go girl!!

GirlBoy Part IV

We have arguments and most of the time the day doesn’t end without us resolving the conflict. That’s how we handle the relationship. Lately he’s been talking about a certain girl he had a crush on. They just live near each other but that fact doesn’t worry me at all. I’m not the jealous type and I trust him completely. I know he’s not going to hurt me. We’ve just been together for a couple of months and we know we have a strong relationship. One night we had a terrible fight over our schedules because we have both been very busy and It was not a good time to converse after a long tiring day. We parted ways not feeling good about each other at all. I needed space.

Missing My Friends.. Again

I have been missing my friends for a couple of weeks right now. Due to some changes in schedules, promotions, etc. I begin to look for them. We don’t go together anymore as often as we can. Thank God Wena and I have been spending some bonding sessions these past few days, one was when we met at Starbucks for some chit chatting and online duties and just this afternoon after we went together to Ayala to watch the movie Dark Knight which I have been dying to see. A leatst I still have one friend in the office to talk to whenever and wherever. Alrose, Jen, Wena and I are planning to get together sometime next month and I’m hoping it will push through. Anyways to sum up all of this, all I just want to say is I miss you guys! Let’s kip in touch.

GirlBoy Part III

Relieved. That’s the right description. I went ahead for uncertainty but I didn’t regret it. I’m a risk taker, but so far all is well and I feel so very much in love. Nothing can surpass what I felt that time. He’s been great and I realized what a wonderful person he is. I feel that I’m so contented with my life although lately my friends have been complaining of not going out with them anymore, that I’ve become an anti-social. Once in a while I thought about my ex and the painful goodbye we bid to each other but I feel that I’m so in love and that moment that was the most important thing ever. I do have responsibilities, but I have begun to neglect it out of my need to be with him. We were both attention seekers, and he needs me to be with him all the time and likewise. It’s a crazy love. We were both crazy. In fact, I agree until now that my being so in love could be the one thing that will have almost destroyed me.

Summer in Camotes

All work and no play makes Juan a dull boy. So to better speak, we work out as a team; we go out as a team. The place: Camotes Island, a beautiful place to relax, enjoy, and better yet to be in the company of people in the office outside of work. We boarded some sea craft on our way to Camotes and we traveled for around 30-45 minutes where we will stay overnight in Santiago Bay Resort. We went to as far as Mangodlom were we enjoyed the fantastic view, white sand and of course the beach.Mangodlom has a pool nearby the beach so if you feel like not coming to the salt water, you can just enjoy and dip in the pool there. But for us we both went salty and fresh! The escapade doesn’t just end there. We went for some videoke galore during the night. Overall, I find the whole trip fun and exciting. This has been my second time here in Camotes but I must admit that the place never fails to bring happy memories.

GirlBoy PartII

It happened so fast and before I knew I have fallen in love with him. He was somebody who was always there for me all the time and most of all he was just near me. That’s what I needed. Presence. Long before we knew we became inseparable. It’s just simple. I have fallen in love with somebody else. Someone else not you. I knew I hurt him with those words but there’s no point in lying. It’s now or never. I wished him well and hoped I could escape the scene that I’m into. For a moment we hugged each other and I said I’m sorry. For the first time in 6 years, I said goodbye to him.

Little Lester

He’s almost two years old and he’s becoming bigger and bigger every day. This is my cute little nephew and let me show his pictures that I took since he came and lit up our lives. That face just reminds me of my sister. She smiles exactly the way little Lester smiles too.Although this Kido won't go near me because he seldom sees his tita, I make sure I bribe him with things he wants to get so I can cuddle to him... nice idea.

Wave Eight

This was held during our First Year Anniversary as a Wave. This was our group picture taken by Griz’s boyfriend Ronald when he went with us during our get together in Patio Isabel. Everyone except Jen and Ben were there to enjoy and eat out. Jen couldn’t come that time because a family member died, and I’m not so sure where Ben was at that time also. I remembered well how we started as agents in the floor. We are the 8th wave to hit production. These were the people I have first met beginning my career life and these are the same people whom I have become close until this day. Of course, there have been changes in the group so far, some were promoted, some went to a greener pasture and some remained loyal agents including me of course! Well, I got amazed with this pix because Jen and Ben were suddenly there ( it’s not obvious eh?) So, who could be the photo editor?
No one else but Francis… hehehe.
(front row left to right: noel, kim, me, aisah,wena, ben)
(back row left-right: Francis, Herbie, Niko, Jake, Griz, Jen)

GirlBoy Part I

I know I have to finish what I came here for. I spent one sleepless night thinking about the perfect words to say, with conviction…without any hesitation. I’ve traveled how many kilometers just to realize my plan. It’s not going to be easy but I have to do it. My happiness is his loss and I feel like I’m the most selfish person alive. But I have to do it. I know I can. Somebody promised me. He would love me forever. And I know deep inside me I would just do anything for him. And so he told me if I love him I should let the other one go and we’ll start a new life together, full of love joy and companionship. And I’m doing right now exactly what he wanted. I’m doing this for him. I’m doing this for love. Ahh.. Love. It’s a crazy feeling. Makes the wrong seem right, leaves you numb, makes you want more. Makes you feel everything that you don’t imagine you could ever be. And so I patiently waited for him in his board house. I know he’s coming, I don’t know but the thought of It left my hands cold… and warm... and now its sweating. Somehow it feels the tension it’s going to face, and then I saw him. That handsome face which haunted me for a couple of years. The one I thought who would keep my heart beating forever. Until now. He was surprised when he saw me. I thought I saw in a glance a hint of longing in his eyes but that suddenly disappeared and what replaced it was a cold stare and for a for the moment I thought I knew well what I’m going to say. But looking at his sad eyes made me hesitate for a moment. “I waited for you for hours to meet me in your dormitory”. He said. What happened? I know I should spill out everything already. The time has come. I decided not to see you anymore. Was what I responded. I would like to see you that day you came unexpectedly in our school but what you didn’t know then was that I was with somebody else. I couldn’t face you that time because I’m afraid, to tell you everything…. “Is it that difficult for you to say you don’t love me anymore?” He snapped. I couldn’t utter a word. “If you’re having a hard time leaving me that means you’re not yet ready to let go of me.” “That you still love me. I couldn’t understand him. Here I am facing the guy I’ve come to love since I was 12, ready to break his heart. I’m a heartbreaker, a villain, a selfish woman, but yet he’s still hoping that this is something we could s till fix, that we could just forget that this ever happened. I expected anger and hatred from him because I have been unfaithful and I hated him for that because I was not prepared to respond to his consideration and plea. I expected him to burst out and tell me I’m the worst person he has ever met. But instead the opposite happened. That’s when I knew, I couldn’t take it anymore, he doesn’t deserve me and I don’t deserve him more. He deserves someone else. Why? Was all he asked. Was my love not enough for you? I was about to tell him its not because of him or anthing else. But I was taken aback when I saw tears in his eyes.

To be continued…..

Am I or Am I Not? Excerpt from my Journal

I went to a clinic last Tuesday to consult to a doctor about my irregular menstruation. I haven’t gotten my period yet for almost three months and its beginning to worry me. I thought I was pregnant. So after long months of worry and pregnancy tests used up (which showed up negative) I went to a gynecologist and told her about my situation. It’s my very first time to have myself checked up by a gynecologist. Thank God she’s a SHE so it didn’t leave me so conscious. My doctor carefully checked what needs to be done and it came out I wasn’t pregnant at all. I might be having some hormonal imbalance so she recommended a medicine to take for 10 days and after 10 days of taking it up I should have my menstruation by then. If not, I should go back to her and we’ll see what other tests we can do so we would know what’s up with my body right now. I’m kind of scared but she said lets cross the bridge when we get there. Should I not worry? It’s scaring the hell out of me.

Thumbs Up for Juno

I watched Juno last night and the movie was awesome. I didn’t expect pregnancy to be that cool for Juno and I just love the superb acting of Ellen Paige. No wonder she’s been nominated for Best Actress in this film. For those who don’t know what I’m talking about, Juno is a story of a teenage girl who discovered one summer that she’s pregnant with Bleeker’s ( the baby’s father) child. Of course, they are too young to handle the situation so Juno finds herself searching for a couple who could adopt her child as soon as she delivers the baby. Along the way she discovers a lot about her self and the realization she encountered . I recommend the movie because of its fantastic script and intelligent approach minus the drama. Watch it.

Blogging Mania

I guess this is it. What’s not to like about blogging? You have the freedom to say anything you want to say, express whatever feelings you have in mind and simply talk about anything under the sun. What’s cool is that a lot of my officemates are already into blogging right now and it’s the coolest gig in the floor. Want to join? Why not? Scribble right now!

Back to Normal

After more than two years of being in the night shift, I’m suddenly moved to the day shift… At last! I never even thought that our request would be approved this quickly so I want to thank my manager Pia, for working on it. Thanks Pi! I admit that I have come to like working on the night shift, simply because, for call center agents like us, this is our normal day. This is my second day on a day shift and I’m still getting used to the routine. I now go out in the busy streets during the morning and its even more traffic than it is in the night. I well assume that’s going to be like that anyway. I now wake up at 6:30am which is my usual time to go to sleep after I come home from work. It might take me a few weeks to get used to this scenario; Anyway, I’m glad I’m back to normal. =)

Frank the Culprit

Typhoon Frank has left an indelible mark on me because our house was partly destroyed. The tree in our backyard could not withstand the strong winds and its heavy trunk rested just right the rooftop destroying a portion of our wall and the ceiling.Heavy work has to be done just to get the trunk out of the scene.And considering the cost of house materials these days! Its good thing that my sister who was in the house the time the tree was uprooted was in our living room or else she could have been hurt of the incident.My sister was the one who provided me with the details of the destruction and such.Right now our place is like a ghost town with no access to water and electricity.It might take a while before things go back to normal.

Me when I'm Angry

I don't get mad that often, well at least depending on the situation. The best that somebody can do for me when I'm mad is to leave me alone. My madness equals silence. That's it. The more will I be annoyed when somebody is trying to make amends with me when I'm still mad. I reason out at my own self when I'm alone and I begin to think if what I did was the appropriate behavior. It does take time for me to convince myself that there's no point prolonging the madness. Then my anger leads me to an emotional state, and tears begin to fall. After I shed away the tears, the feeling becomes good again.

Joke

I’m not a joker. I’m a corny joker if I happen to be one. Imagine those many times I played fun but people still took it as a serious thing. See? I’m a lousy joker. But I love jokes. Really. It makes my day light. There are times when I hate it though. It could sometimes be mistaken as a way of telling the truth which I don’t really approve of. The only thing that I hate this thing If its being used as a personal attack to somebody. That doesn’t become a good joke.

Cosmopolitan

For a year now, I have religiously kept monthly issues of Cosmopolitan.
I make sure that I reserve an amount out of my salary to purchase these

issues. Something in me gets this feeling that I feel updated and aware of

social happenings. The magazine is all about women empowerment to the
latest fashion trends, hairstyles, news in and out of the country. Its addictive

for me. Being an independent woman that I am, I make sure I realize goals

not base on what others think as what I should do but me myself thinking what's best that I can do for my own. Although the magazine tackles also about issues concerning on sex, relationships I don't feel it like flooding my mind with things that are unconventional. The magazine itself is informative and thus it brings awareness. So with almost a year and a half of buying Cosmo that I'm pretty sure is a ton of information I can preserve in my nut. =)

Quite Surprise

I did not realize until I was about to log in for work that my schedule has changed.
For almost a month now, I have been following a very early schedule of 6pm until 3am.
I was in fact an hour and a half ahead of time. Well, I’m never really an early bird
And I always log in right before or sometimes late before my punch in time and so It feels
A little bit weird to be this early in the office doing nothing. Because I arrived so hungry in the Office I was very glad to have taken enough time to go to the pantry and eat dinner. I just spent the Whole day sleeping and it was too late for me to grab something to eat. Hmmm… speaking aboutUnhealthy lifestyle. =(

Loving Mom

My mom has been here in Cebu since last week and I love that she has
decided to stay for a few more days. Just the mere sight of her makes me feel
contented and secure and I can't tell her to stay with me longer because I may cause
A drama scene. And so we did things together and we bonded again. We went to the

mall and watched movies and ate and chatted and sigh*; I've never felt this happy before. There's something in her that I miss all the time and that's the comfort and care only a mother can give. It makes me want to be with her always... wanting be within her reach. We went to an optical clinic and had her eyes checked. She's been wanting to wear glasses since her eyesight has been affected because of Diabetes. and now she's got this new pair of glasses which makes her happy because at last she's able to see clearly The things she has been missing for quite a while. Seeing her happy is double happiness for me =)

Hating Math

I definitely hate the subject and I want to delete it in my mind forever.
Its hard to deal with it but its even harder without it, so I guess I have to live with the fact
That I was born with no love for equations and the like. I can only master basic equations but
The rest is not history but absolute nothingness for me.
I never got a grade of 85 plus ever since high school and at some point I tried my very best and
Diligently studied the subject but I guess my patience is my enemy because I easily give up.
After a lot of retakes and more failed than passes I just realized that this is it. I'm super dumb when I talk about this subject.
I do understand that the world rotates around figures and that Money is Math.
But please, I really do hope one time my mind will lighten up or somebody can lighten it up
For me before it's too late. Wink!

Typhoon

I wish the weather would be fine. The wind is so strong that I couldn't imagine
Where the rage came from. Cebu is set to signal no. 2 (unsure) and I was worried
Because of the inconvenience this will give us as well as to people in some other places
who are greatly affected by the typhoon. I haven't had my clothes washed yet by Ate Marivic
(She washes my clothes) because it wont surely dry. So I was hoping for a tiny bit of hope that
sunshine will rise tomorrow and things will be back to normal then.
I'm running out of casual clothes to wear in the office, It's a good thing we're dress down for the
Month of June. Good thing.

Minus Multiply

I woke up two days ago and realized I need to get rid of my multiply account.
I feel better knowing I only have a few sites to maintain and visit and update….
I just want to maintain my Friendster account and my Blogger of course which is the
Haven of my thoughts. Two days because I still had second thoughts of getting rid of it
But now I’m more than determined to totally delete it.
So just a few clicks and my multiply’s going to be deleted.

A kiss

“A kiss is designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous."

-ingrid bergman


I had my first kiss from my ex boyfriend. It was a short kiss but it was followed by a long and passionate one.
Though my hands are cold and my heart was trembling like hell, it managed to be a good kiss.
It happened on a date, on a starry night where I just turned 17. For me, it was the most innocent act ever.
Amidst the worry that I might get pregnant on a first kiss. Education taught me it doesn’t happen that way.
And that was a relief. That boy who gave me my first kiss turned out to be my boyfriend for almost 7 years.
Kisses give us that numb feeling. It connects our actions to what we feel and it feels great. Do you agree?

Missing my College Friends

It’s hard not to miss my college pals. After all, we have been together for a couple of years.We grew up together and had our fair share of ups and downs. It’s sad that we don’t ever get to eat out together, have fun and go strolling along the seashores. I miss my friends Jan and Kath.We shared the same house when were already graduating. Its during those times that our friendship blossomed and so many weird and frightful things happened. But we surpassed it all, and we ended
up okay. Jan is already in Manila and she works for EBay. Kath on the other hand is here in Cebu but we never get to see each other even though we’re just in the same place because of schedules.I may feel alienated but I couldn’t hide the fact that I truly miss my dear friends.

Declaration

I rarely talk about my boyfriend. Perhaps because I know he’s a very private person and
I still think that whatever we share to each other, we share it among ourselves. But this is not a page of revelation but rather a page of declaration. For the one person who took care of me when I’m all alone. Who forgave me when I have been crazy enough to almost break our relationship. Who doesn’t nag me (anymore) if I don’t clean my feet before hopping to bed, Who accepts me for who I am and what I have become Who loves me truly. For being the ever patient one. Honey, this may seem so short but you know what I mean. And this page for you is still never enough..
=hugs&kisses=

Living with "It"

Meredith ( greys anatomy) said that its better to have someone, even if it hurts, even if it’s the most painful thing you’ve
Ever have to do. Its better still to have someone. Do you agree? I think so… he he I mean its crazy because you have to
endure a lot but its part of “it” right? No matter how much you’re not gonna want that person, you can only say that right at that very moment.
But truth is you just don’t care as long as you stick together for what’s the matter like. In good and bad times.
Nah… just woke up this morning feling like a little hopless romantic.
And by the way.. Happy father’s day to all paps out there!!

Moving On

It’s high time that I move on. Not because I have to. But he has already.
For sometime he has been occupying my mind and it has given me
restless nights thinking how I ended up something I don’t want to end.
I feel stupid at most crazy. It’s making me sick and it drives me into nothingness.
I feel I’m the most selfish person in the world. I should have done this long before.
I should have let go. But I was afraid to be alone feeling this feeling.
I need someone to share this to even if its not supposed to be.
Even if it’s not meant to be.
I have been unfair but I kept it to myself. I don’t want to make things worse.
There would be someone who will be most affected. I can't bear that.
I need somebody to understand me and tell me how to get rid of this
Before it destructs me, before it ruins me.
But he has moved on long before I realize.
And now I’m alone, feeling this feeling.
Bitter. Lonely. Helpless.

So Called Relationships..

I always love to talk about relationships. I want to know how other relationships work aside from what I have. I admit I am not a good partner. Sometimes I feel, that I have disregarded the persons who have given me true love and devotion.I admit I was not happy choosing decisions I know I would regret and still in the phase of regretting.I still choose my mind over my heart and not just once did it leave me wounded.But I have too. There’s something in me that doesn’t approve of giving your entire self for a relationship.And I’m quite confused because they said loving is giving out your all. At any costs.There is a thin line between giving your best but at the same time that you’re in love And giving not the hundred percent but still in love.There have been a lot of instances that we are aware of how love can be most powerful and how it can be the most dangerous.Depends on how you use it.

A Disregarded Passion

I dreamt of being a teacher when I was a kid.
I would use to gather younger kids around our neighborhood and teach them.
I used to teach them under the shade of a tree but soon enough we found an isolated house
In a neighborhood, and that’s were we made it into a classroom with all the benches and walls to use as a board.
I taught by heart and that made me realize that when I grow up, I would want to get the noblest job of all.
Times passed, influences came and dreams seem to surmount with all the things life can offer.
I was bombarded with all the nice things that I would want to be and would like to do.
I forgot that I wanted to become a teacher.
I was told I was good in compositions and I was articulate.
Thanks to the fine education my parents gave me we wee exposed in a place where education is given at its finest
I grew up fond of watching news and current events and was amazed how newscasters and the media overall could be
A very powerful instrument in shaping up the society. I had this passion for writing and delivering news.
I was assigned as the editor in chief in our school publication and this was I realized I have the potential of being in the media industry.
I disregarded my mother’s request to become a nurse simply because I feel I can’t be what she wants me to be. I can be me with my own freewill.
I took up Development Communication and majored in Broadcasting. But college life is not easy as it seems to be. I know most of you will agree with me on that.
Somehow, freedom can make you go crazy and can lead you to temptations. That’s of course in your own discretion.
Right now, I’m working as a customer representative. I love the job because it fulfills me.
But I still have that one passion left in my heart. Something I know in time I’m going to do.
Something I believe would totally complete me.
Something I would like to consider doing even if I’m already old.
Something that’s still in my heart.
The passion for Teaching.

Self Treat

I decided last Tuesday to treat myself by going to the mall alone and go window shopping.
Actually. I was also excited to watch a movie and was torn between watching Caregiver by Sharon Cuneta
And Sex and the City. Well, I choose to watch Sex and the City because I’m just thrilled of how it’s going to make my day light
I don’t want to cry and I know a hundred percent that I’m going to cry watching Caregiver.
I bought Bavarian which is my “baon” inside the theater and was kind of 10 minutes late. Hehe
I was never a fan of Sarah Jessica Parker and didn’t know anything about how sex and the city goes.
I wasn’t able to watch the sitcom but I heard something that made me want to watch the movie.
Designer clothes, shoes, elegant apartments, high profile jobs….. Every girl’s wish
And I did not go home disappointed. The movie I think was very humorous and I can’t just help it but I laughed all by myself!
It was a very enjoyable moment for me.

Elyn and My Vacation

My friend Elyn told me my page here is kind of bright.
Screen properties perhaps might have affected the way my blog is being read by my devoted friend.
It look s fine in my computer but she said it’s too bright.
Anyways, I decided then again to change my theme. Something that’s more pleasant to the eyes.
Ellyn’s got that big influence in me.
I had been through almost a week long’s rest and I went home to Ormoc because its fiesta time.
I can’t tell you how drunk I was during the disco night that I totally forgot how I got home.
Geez. Alcohol and its effect on me. I could have been a drunkard if not for my skills to get drunk after
5 shots of whiskey. I danced the night away and met with friends whom I have not seen for quite a while.
Everything’s been fine since I left home but my nephew still won’t go near me. Hehe
Fiesta came and we had a sumptuous feast. The food and all is taking a toll on me. Hehe
I feel so full all the time.
We went to the beach the next day to relax and enjoy the summer heat.
Well, summer yeah… I’ve earned sunburn but I loved it.
Nice vacation.

The Filipino Way

Filipino families are known to have close family ties. We still get in touch with our immediate families even though children and have raised also one of their own. We not only remain closely bonded by our immediate families but we also are open to the possibilities of living even with our extended relatives like our grandfathers, grandmothers, aunts, uncles, cousins and even distant relatives In such a way, this has allowed us to establish a close relationship with our family members. From childhood to adulthood; children depend mostly from their parents in almost all aspects of their lives. They are our first teachers and we learn from them first the do’s and don’ts. Our parents guide us in almost everything that we do in especially in molding our values as a person. Like most families we focus in building respect for one another. It has been our tradition to follow our parents and respect their decisions which they think would be the best thing for us to do. We look up to our parents like role models and what we become when we grow up is largely dependent of how they managed to handle us in a way that they become the major influence in our lives. That’s why as soon as we become adults, we feel that we owe to them much of the responsibility of taking care of them in return for what they have done to us.
Filipinos, who are closely tied in nature also brings out one of the best traits we are known for and that’s the trait of hospitality. We welcome with gratitude anybody who comes in to our place and give them the best possible treatment we can give to make our visitors comfortable during their stay. We treat our guests with utmost care and importance. Our rich culture and tradition brings about important and lively festivities. During these times we also get to see distant relatives gathered to celebrate important functions in the society. We have fiestas conducted annually to honor our patron saints which vary for every place in the Philippines. This remains as one of the most colorful and celebrated happenings in our society. Everybody is invited complete with a sumptous feast and warmest welcome. There are a lot of Filipino traits that we can be proud of. Some have been practiced since by our ancestors and has been passed on to generations. We live in a way where we value ourselves and the people around us. This is what we call the bayanihan spirit, it’s a way of ensuring that you can get help when you need it which results in companionship among others.We work hard but we don’t forget to take things lightly no matter how hard its affecting us. We have a great workforce evident by existing Filipino workers from all over the world who give various services, and this gives us a sense of pride. For ones capability and skills to be recognized offshore is a n achievement not only of that Filipino individual but with the whole country as well. We have a soft spot for our families. We were brought up nurtured with love and care from our parents and they have alsoprovided us with education that we need, something that our parents say is a gift that nobody can steal from us; and its true. We were taught to value education because it is the only thing that would guarantee as with a bright future.

Turning Two

I would like to congratulate my co-wave mates at work for two years of being together.
We celebrated our 2nd year anniversary on April 27th but mine was April 28th because I came in
One day later than the class. It’s been some time that we got along together, so many memories that we have
Made in the past. A lot has changed though but the good thing is we’re still the same, and were even stronger.
We are going to miss some of us who have gone to pursue their dreams outside our workplace. To Nikko,
Whose already in Japan right now, to Jake whose in Singapore already and to Francis who’s going to study
Another course or masterals (not so sure) and to my Hunny whose decided to work somewhere else. We will miss you guys! I thank all of you for being a part of my stay in this wonderful company, more years hopefully to come
In our stay here. Working has been fun with you and our little laughs, our hangouts. Videokes times and especially
Our eat out times hehehehe! Wonderful. To those of us who are still here the same as I am, more of this to come.

Mom

It’s not everyday that we need them. Or so I thought
At this point of my life, I feel I need to spread out my wings alone.
I need to know how it is to live without her is.
I love every bit of freedom that I savor. Away from a protective embrace.
I don’t need to worry about the time I go home and whether I go home or not.
I’m free of all the nag and beatings.
I’m so absolutely free.
Being alone made me realize.
Its so very hard to live without the one person you have so thought made life harder for you during the younger years.
In my life, I learned that the best things are learned the hard way.
Darn I imagined those nights when I was sick and no mama was there to comfort me.
I’m sick of eating out in fast foods and preparing precooked meals.
I’m craving for those things she use to prepare in the table.
I’ve craved for food prepared by her because I’m beginning to forget how it tastes like.
There was no one to tell me how bad I am because she sees that in me recently.
I’ve lost a mirror in my life because she never fails to remind me.
You become what you want to be.
Its so very true.
For a special day as today, I’d like to tell my mom.
Thank you.
For Everything that I have now and what I have become now is all because of
YOU.

My life in a JOURNAL

Last night, I had a good night sleep.
I slept at 10 am and woke up at 3am. I felt good, but I feel alone.
Nonetheless, I tried to keep myself busy by arranging some things
And I came across some pads with notes written all over.
I read what was written there, I couldn’t remember what It was but I was just
Aware of my own handwriting. I smiled to myself and thought that then and now I’m still
The same. I’m not expressive of what I feel but I write it down instead.
Writing is a therapy for me. I don’t write for a lot of reasons other than to express myself.
Since my high school years, I keep a journal of the things that happened to me.
It made me feel at ease with my own self.
I scribbled on the notes and found out it was a letter I wrote for someone beloved.
It’s kind of cheesy and I laughed at my own self for being so corny.
Those were the crush2x days.
The giggling moments of my life.

The superstitous way of getting Married

We had this little fun with a cousin where I’m to pull a strand of hair,
Tie it within a wedding ring, submerge it in a glass of water and count the
Number of times it will bounce back and forth the glass. The result?
Number of times = age you’re going to get married.
She had 27 bounces so she will be married at the age of 27.
These are superstitions but I love this kind of thing. It interests me.
Or is it the thought of me settling down which is making me thrilled.
My price? I don’t get any bounce at all. Not a single one. So that means I’m not
Getting married. Imagine that. Hehehe…If you’re doomed to stay single for the rest of
Your life then what a life. ( I don’t know if its ok with me or not)
Can I appeal?
I think it’s too early.
Still 23.

On Leave

I’ll be on leave for the next couple of days.
I am so excited to just rest and do nothing at all.
No pressures, no quick naps, no worries.
I’ve wanted to go on leave since February.
But process needs me to wait until May to go on leave.
And my determination to file that leave form!
At last, here it is.

I’m going to spend time reading that book which I neglected for months.
I’m going to spend so much time talking to my mother who is here in Cebu.
I’m going to sleep normal sleep hours for the next few days.
I’m going to enjoy. Relax.
BUT
I’m going to miss work.

Work for me is pressure with benefits.
Its an abnormal schedule but it keeps you going.
You may hate it sometimes but you will love the perks most of the time.
It has a lot of process but it teaches you to know the word DISCIPLINE.
It brings out the best and worst in me.

I am ME

It’s a wonderful day today.
We just went though our team building and everything was fun.
It’s a great escape from work and from the busy city.
It’s also a team building for some teams within our account
We went to El Salvador, within Danao.
A treat from an account where I work for (thanks Boss Lai)
The food was great and the place is so relaxing that I don’t want to go home.
But, work is waiting for us so off we have to go. Hehehe.
I have yet to upload some pictures in my Friendster page and grab some other pictures
From my officemates. I’m not so much in to multiply, it’s still an online community because
I just really want to maintain one account. I do have an account there but I don’t get to update
It on a frequent basis.

I’ve learned a lot during our team building because we conducted some activities.
I got to know myself better and I became aware of some things that I need to work on.
It made me realized that there is something in me that I need to expose, A little bit.
I am known to be a very silent and a discreet person.
I don’t talk, I prefer to be alone and I don’t want to get attention.
I feel that I can work at my best if I’m alone.
I don’t mean to undermine the people around me.
I don’t have any problems working with my team.
I conform to what’s the thing that we need to agree on.
I don’t have questions, if I do mostly that would be work related.
The team building made me realize the REASONS behind this.
I feel most grateful to have known myself better.
I don’t want to create conflict. In fact I hate it.
I don’t talk because I don’t have anything to share.
I don’t want to make up things just for me to be able to share anything.

Sometimes, I know my being silent is a hindrance to a/some dynamic relationship/s.
I agree. I’m aware of that. But I am contented of myself and I don’t want to change just because it’s a risk to my social life.
We have individual preferences, and I know people are intelligent enough to understand that we are different from each other.
What will make you happy may not be the same for me.
I’m open to criticisms and I find it very constructive for a person’s personality.
It’s difficult to change but I’m trying. All along I’m aware of the wonderful people around me.
They put a smile in my face even if I’m just in the corner.
They make me worry when I hear they have problems.
They make me close to tears also when they are crying.
Even if I’m just in a corner, silent and busy doing her own thing.
If people cant accept me for who I am. It’s ok.
All I need is to be respected of who I am even though I’m like this,
Just as I respect other people for who they are
Even if they are Entirely different of me.

Whitey

It’s one of the precious gifts I ever got.
It was given to us by a priest and I was so delighted.
I’ve never seen a creature that has the blackest round eyes
The rest of his body is purely white. With some cute gray spots
In his stomach. I loved every inch of him.
I know he was afraid when I tried to touch him first.
I sensed fear in those black eyes. But I patiently waited until that
Day he came near me. That moment was unforgettable.
We seldom see each other because during that time because I live in our university dorm.
I got to see him only once a week.
A friendship grew between us. I couldn’t care less if I talk and he doesn’t talk back.
His gestures and movements are enough for me to understand that somehow he knew.
He follows me everywhere. On my way to the farm, in the house.
Even wakes me up in my room when I don’t feel like waking up early.
I beat him sometimes for the nasty things he do
But I love him.
It was like that way for three years.
I wondered one day when I did not see him after I got back from school.
I just though he went somewhere else with the other dogs around our area.
But I saw him in one corner in the house, awake but he’s not moving.
I can see his eyes tired, red around its corners. I know he’s sick.
I cared for him like I’ve never cared for anything before but I have to leave in the meantime
To go to school, I wished he’ll be alright then. I wanted his strength to come back.
I was relieved to see him alive and well when I went home. But he’s still lying around one corner
His eyes are still red and he grew so thin.
It made me cry.
I couldn’t afford to see him like that. But I did not loose hope
Although I was frightened something in me is saying I’m going to loose him.
Forever.
I talked to him the day I have to leave for school. I told him he’ll always be my favorite dog.
And that I love Him. I noticed his ear move and I know he’s listening.
I came home a week later and I kind of expected that they are going to tell me he’s gone.
He passed away just in time I left him a week earlier.
I felt weak and I missed his presence. I missed him until it hurts. Until I cried.
They buried him in the backyard where a fruit tree now grows
And I know I just can’t forget him. It has been six years then.
Still I haven’t forgotten him. Whitey. A very common name for an extraordinary dog.
Today is the day he was given to me.

What's the Drama?

I do agree. Money can’t buy everything.
Life’s best things are for free.
I’m feeling lonely and desperate right now,
I wanted to break free. I need to go home.
Home is such a wonderful place for me.
It brings out life’s simplicity. It completes me.
Not that living in the city is a mistake.
A lot would even disagree; Urban life is a sign of
Modernization and progress. But I’m not raised in this way.
I feel like I’m still looking for a niche in this environment.
It doesn’t make me happy, but it gives me the perks.
Something not everybody can have.
What is holding me back is the thought that it’s a lifeline for me
To be here, to survive even if you want to give up. Even if your heart Is yearning for something... Even if’s have buts.Consideration, Survival. Life is not always living the way you want it to
You have to bear what life sometimes offers you. It’s not easy but who said its always easy though?
I wish I have a choice.
But now, I know I don’t.

Must Be Crazy

Not everyday is a good day.
Today I’m mad because I’m feeling lazy.
Now do you feel lazy too?
The feeling sucks. I want to get rid of the laziness
But it’s here and it’s taking over me tonight.
I wasted a day of my off. Because I think I just need a rest
Complete rest. Yeah. Like I haven’t these past few weeks.
Resting physically but I’m tired. Emotionally.
I don’t know why. There are things that I want to do but I can’t.
It’s crazy. I got to get back to my senses.
I need to.
I can do it.
*sigh

What’s with the 8?

I was born on the 8th of December 1984.
I was supposed to be named Maria Immaculada…. Maria Concepcion… Maricon, but my mother loved Michelle
And so I’m Michelle.
My mobile number has a lot of 8’s…. 09282628985. (See?)
My employee id number has a number 8.
My log in id has a number 8.
I was hired in my job April 28th.
My atm number has a number 8
My credit card has a lot of number 8’s.
I took up my first exam at work at 8am.
I was interviewed at 8pm
My first shift was at 8 pm.
Of all the shifts that I had 8 pm is the most common shift I have.
My father died on August 8.
August is the 8th month of the year.
I said yes to my first boyfriend on August 18.
August 18 is the birthday of my ex bf.
I always win when my contestant number is number 8.


Now what’s with the 8?
Simple… lucky or unlucky 8 is my number.

My life (What You May Not Know) Part I

Born in a busy city, grew up in the rural areas, Stubborn. Willful. Impatient. Sealed lips but with a racing mind.
Prefers to go with a few rather than with the many.Sensitive but tough. Has a tendency to spoil. Hates Math. Failed in math related subjects.Took up Development Communication back in first year college.Failed the Screening
Took up Agricultural Development but took the second screening for Development Communication Passed and proceeded with Development Communication.Loves everything about my Course majored in Broadcasting.Joined the School Publication assigned as a News Editor.Silent in class but will answer if attention is called.Prefers essay types of tests rather than identification and other types Hates teachers who live by the book.My silence means no.I have reasons for everything.Wish I could be blunt.An Ineffective Liar.My Family is my weakness My father died when I was in college. He died while working in Africa.Failures for me before I worked was like being very dumb.Failure for me now is gaining more strength and acknowledging that some things happen for a reason.Work motivation: the perks, the fulfillment, the maturity.

Fling.

He’s my textmate and I like him. LIKE. No demands, no talk about love nothing. He’s just a fling. It happened when I showed up on behalf of another friend.It’s crazy but yeah I was convinced to do it. Boy, oh boy, I’m heading to trouble hhahaha! And so I met him, a total stranger! Stranger my face! Came out he’s a guy from a neighborhood barrio and from a neighborhood school. I’m taller than him but he’s got good looks. Great, something I could well… get along with. What’s nice is we don’t have any demands we just talk talk and talk and we listen to music together with his ipod that he brings wherever he goes we stroll along the beach we had a really nice time and then came the bomb. He has a girlfriend right in our very school. It turned me off completely but as I’ve said its ok we both knew the relationship was not for keeps it’s just a fling. God, I wouldn’t be surprised if somebody would pick a fight in me at the middle the road.

My Heart’s Revelation Part III

He texted me again and there it all began. We don’t dwell so much in knowing each other, because it’s so easy to know him without asking him myself.

It felt awkward for me to know the person personally, and so I never asked. Didn’t. We talked about anything under the sun till he got to the point of confession.

And I know somehow I feel something special to, that something I could not explain. I’m willing to take a risk. And so it all started… a new beginning for me!

This might be it.

My Heart’s Revelation PART II

He came like an unwanted guest in the house, where the pain was still fresh and all I needed to do was to be alone. His aura is something That challenged me. I met him in a rainy night, when I went home to celebrate my birthday. They were stuck in the rain since the vehicle They were riding along with a friend had an engine problem and so we met there in the vehicle where I was also riding. We have been civil to each other; I’ve known him since we were little kids but never got the chance to mingle because we don’t go to the same school, we don’t have anything in common that could lead us together, but that night was different and it allowed me to forget something that I’ve wanted to forget, all along all these months. He was an answer to my prayer. I did not expect anything from that meeting and from the conversation that we had but somehow seeing him excites me. But I did not hope for anything to spark, I’m still hurting and it hurts damn too much. His message came one afternoon from out of the blue, he texted me and told me he’s returning my umbrella, oh yes! I forgot,. He borrowed my umbrella during the night that we met. I even wondered where he got my number, said he got it from a common friend of ours, when I was on my way to school I dropped by his house to get my umbrella but his mother was the one who gave it to me because he Wasn’t there. And I don’t know why but I felt a little disappointed because I wasn’t able to see him… to be continued…

My Heart’s Revelation PART I

The day he told me he’s not choosing me, it’s like it’s the end of my happy days. I fought for him till the end, but he Doesn’t want me anymore, it took me long to realize that one, or maybe I was blinded by my own emotions that I did not See it coming or did not realize that the reality hit me, like a slap in the face, wanting me to let go because it’s enough, because it’s not right anymore. With tears streaming through my cheeks, I nodded and wished him well, even though my heart was bleeding even if it hurts so much to see him go. But I lost. And I thought maybe I’m not going to get over him, ever. Advices don’t seem to work for me, not even the most brilliant idea of diverting my attention to ease the pain to forget but the heart is such a fierce competitor, the more you want to forget, the more it haunts you with all those memories with all those wonderful times, where all the love that you’ve known existed. It hurts but time has been very patient with me, and I loved every single bit of the hurt that I feel because it made me stronger, the more I though I loose the more I wanted to win not in love but in the accomplishments and in the endeavor I have to take. Nobody can help me but me because no one can understand what I have been through…. I swore I won’t allow myself to let somebody hurt me until he came and everything began to change again…. To be continued.

Change

My work schedule has been adjusted to an earlier time, not so much of a hassle in coming in to the office because its vacation time for students, and somehow there's less traffic. Anyway, its just around 30 minutes at my usual time earlier than my original schedule. It feels great to be working right now, here in my station, taking calls and chatting a bit. hehehe. Deleting mails from my inbox and thinking about numerous things that I need to do in the days to come. I skipped gym for over 2 months now and I think I need to go back again to that routine. I dont feel in any way healthy right now so I must need to get back to the right track. Can I for the second time around?

A Meeting that Led to a Cold War

I met with my ex boyfriend last Sunday. I don't want to mention ex though because he's more of a friend right now to me. A confidante. thats it. My boyfriend did not speak for a day because of our meeting. Jealous but there's really nothing to be jealous of. We remain friends throughout those years of existing and non existent communication. Besides, ending a love affair does not mean an end of a friendship.Break ups are rather considered as a make or break situation.. to keep the treatment cordial and civil or rather not to speak with each other for the rest of your lives.wheew, now thats heavy. But I choose to be still friends with him because theres really no point of beign a stranger to someone you've known for how many years of
your life.

Lost in Space

I've been feeling lost these days. My mind wanders a lot lately and it seems like It's working on its own. The days just pass by like nothing really cared.Not even the most imporatant things in my life.. or persons.. Does this also happen to you? Like you're left with nothing but your own self wanting to let go of something you dont even know. Well, maybe soul searching is the right word for me to divulge in to. I want to know where I'm going from here. I wanna know what sense do I make in my own self. I'm lost and I dont know what to do. Help me before this gets even worse.

Ching Fatty

The worst thing of getting fat is the social reaction and believe me its never been good. Well at some point, you're being told point blank in the face how fat you've become and how bad you look like now than what you were before. Sometimes I tend to laugh it off, but worse it becomes annoying and most of all it will leave you hurting. Like being fat is a grave sin and that you are not entitled to your own preference of how sometimes you would like to feel how it is to be in this situation. I know the world is obsessed with physical perfection and beauty and the ugly and fat are left behind... No matter how people say that being the extra size you are should always come with the confidence on how you carry on yourself but come to think of the reality? People would not care less if that's what you think. What they see is what they believe and sometimes having a heart will always be left behind. For people like me who are struggling to loose weight, the best thing to think is at least we tried, we might not have exerted enough effort and some methods might not have worked at all but one thing's for sure... It doesnt make us less of a person of what we have become now.

A Brief Encounter

I didn’t know that our storm signal here in Cebu is set to no.2. That’s how behind I am to the news. Well who thought? When it has been always raining for the past weeks and though there are some differences, (my roof’s about to dismantle and the strong winds ready to blow the roof up!) Well that’s slight difference, hehe! Everything feels so cold. I just took a bath in less than 10 minutes coz I can’t stand the cold. My shift starts at 10 pm and I wont ride a taxi anymore the way I used to coz it’s consuming too much of my budget. I know sometimes I’m too lazy to ride a jeepney (I’m three rides away from work) but if the situation calls for me to then no choice then taxi galore. I love my new shift right now coz I don’t have to beat the heavy traffic. My previous shift starts at 8pm which is still rush hour in so I have to wake up as early as 6pm .Now in my new shift., I can manage to wake up at 9pm and still I wont be late for my work. So where does this story go? What the hell is my topic? Well, I was startled to know that one of the passengers of the jeepney I’m riding is a very familiar face. She just happens to be the sister of my ex. It brought back memories to me. We were not that close but we managed to be civil to each other. But it still brought back happy memories that I’ve shared with these people. There was so much to explain but I managed not too. Anyway, I know that whatever happened in the past, it did not affect anything of what they have now, especially my ex boyfriend. I had once a lot of issues. Sometimes it’s too nice to reminisce it but knowing how it ended is just too painful to remember. Maybe it’s better not thinking about it at all. Just maybe.

The 23 Years of My LIFE

I thank the Almighty for the 22 years of good life. Now, I’m turning 23 and it’s going to be another journey. I have a lot of things to Ask for but I figured it out that there is nothing I would need except to have good health and the rest will follow. This blog will be forThose people who have nurtured me and made me who I am right now. This I owe to all of you.
To my mama who has been there through all the good and bad times of our lives. Nothing can replace the love a mother has to give.To my sister who has been my companion through those light and heavy moments. Until the end I will just be here.To my brother in law for taking care of my sister and the rest of my family. Kuya, you make me proud.To our little angel baby Lester for bringing peace into our home. Tita misses you already.To my relatives who share my triumphs, my ups and downs thank you.
To my good friend Elyn… the one who knows me next to myself, thanks for the friendship.To my classmates for being a part of my life… Wherever you are right now, the memories will always remain in my heart.To my friends, you’re my life’s treasures. Thank you.To my exes and flings in the past, thank you for giving me the opportunity to love and be loved.To my boyfriend, for his never ending patience and support. Most of all for the Love. Thank you hon.To everyone who in one way or another I’ve come across with, thank you for being a part of me.